Tag Archives: dogs

How much is that guilt-trip in the window? (With photos)

Wordsworth: Hey Mama, what are you putting into that bag?

Me: A swimsuit and a change of clothes. Daughter and I are going to see some friends at their family’s lake house.

Wordsworth: I don’t think I know what a lake is but I can’t wait to find out!

Me: Sorry buddy, but we can’t bring you with us. Maybe another time.

Wordsworth: Oh. I see how it is. So I’m just gonna go ahead and stare at you pathetically through the window as you back out of the driveway. We’ll see how much you’ll enjoy your trip to the lake WITHOUT ME.

Son: Sheesh, it’s like something out of a horror story. “The house has been abandoned for years, but on fine summer days, people still see the ghost of a yellow lab staring sadly out the window at them.”

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The Marauder’s Map of my Backyard (cartoon)

This is an arial representation of our backyard. It's huge.

To illustrate its size, this is our 140-pound dog, Emerson.

"This is our yard after the first big snowfall of the year."

"This is our yard two MONTHS later." (tiny area of footprints, only around the house)

"As you can see, Emerson is not very adventurous."

"This is how our yard looked two DAYS after Wordsworth came to live with us."

(Entire yard covered in footprints).

"To summarize, in the style of a popular book and film series:"

Wordsworth, wearing a collar and leash in Gryffindor colors: "I solemnly swear that I am up to no good."

Messrs Moony, Wormtail, Padfoot & Prongs present The Marauder's Map of my backyard

Emerson, wearing Hufflepuff colors: "Mischief Managed."

You Move, You Lose (cartoon)

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A New Roommate (cartoon)

Me: This is my friend's cat. She's going to be living with us for a while.
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A Tale of Three Fetchers (cartoon)

Me: My friends' dogs Milo and Ruby are staying with us for the weekend

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Subtlety is not Selby’s strongest quality

Me: ZZZZZZZzzzzzz

Selby: *pant pant pant*

Clock: It’s 6 am.

Selby: *pantpantpantpantpantpantpantpantpantpant*

Me: *ignore*

Selby: *PANTPANTPANTPANTPANTPANTPANTPANTPANTPANT*

Me: Did you need something Selby?

Selby: Oh good morning Kari, how nice to see you awake! What a lovely surprise!

Me: I’m only awake because you have been panting in my face for 5 minutes.

Selby: I’m glad it worked! Since you’re up would you mind getting me some breakfast?

Me: *grrrrr*

Fetch. You’re doing it wrong.

Scouty and Sammy: Play fetch?

Me: Okay. *throws ball*

Scouty: I’ll get it, Kari!

Sammy: No I will get it!

Scouty: Okay I give up.

Sammy: HAHA OLD MAN YOU ARE TOO SLOW! *gets ball*

Me: Good job, now bring it here so I throw it again!

Sammy: *drops ball*

Me: Um, Sammy, that’s 3 feet away. You’re supposed to bring it TO me.

Sammy: Beggars can’t be choosers, Kari. If you wanted the ball over there you should have gotten it yourself.

Scouty: I would have brought it all the way there.

One pet’s trash is another pet’s treasure (cartoon)

Emerson: MAMA! HELP! I AM TRAPPED! Continue reading →

Emerson takes care of me (with photo)

Emerson: What’s the matter Mama? You don’t seem like yourself.

Me: I don’t feel well today. I came home early from work because I’m sick.

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In her own sweet time

Me: Emerson! Selby! Come inside!

Emerson: Okay Mama! *galumph galumph*

Selby: I cannot hear you. I am busy sniffing the snow and pretending not to hear you.

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