ME: Um, hey, Sir Oliver. What are you doing here? You’re not supposed to be outside without my daughter.
SIR OLIVER: I’m just as surprised as you are. I was just minding my own business, walking around the kitchen, when suddenly I found myself outside. I certainly didn’t go outside alone on purpose, because I know that is not allowed and I would never, ever break the rules.
ME: Except for all the times you’ve snuck out in the past. And all the times you have jumped on the counter. And all the times you…
SIR OLIVER: You have no proof that I ever did any of that.
ME: Shall I show you pictures?
SIR OLIVER: Just shut up and open the door, Columbo.