Me: Lord Dormir! I have something for you!
Lord Dormir: What is it?
Me: It’s a t-shirt.
Lord Dormir: … Why in the hairball would you get me a t-shirt?
Me: I got it for you so you won’t be cold with your short fur. Here you go.
Lord Dormir: I’m not wearing that.
Me: Why not?
Lord Dormir: Well to begin with, that green color clashes horribly with my beautiful orange fur. Secondly, those horizontal stripes make me look fat. Thirdly, the label says it is for dogs.
Me: I know it’s pretty ugly, but it was only a dollar and I wasn’t about to spend a bunch of money on something if you were just going to take it off like you do with your collar. If you keep it on then I will buy you something more flattering.
Lord Dormir: I will wear it as long as you continue petting me. Beyond that I will make no guarantees.


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